Learning about yourself and others, informing a powerful journey in Forensic Psychology
Welcome everyone to the next instalment of the Pathways to Psychology blog!
This blog post is written by Liz Utting, a seasoned and experienced Forensic Psychologist. Liz draws on her own personal experiences which had helped her develop into the caring and nurturing clinician she is now, working with vulnerable young children. Liz shares her reflections on stumbling blocks and diversions across her training, but also speaks of the brilliant opportunities to develop skills and qualities, which now form part of her daily work.
We hope you will find learning about Liz's journey a great inspiration, and possibly one which could inform your own journey.
Liz Utting – Principal Forensic Psychologist BA (Hons) PG Dip Psych MSc CPsychol AFBPsS
Current role – Therapeutic Services Manager / Clinical Lead at Horizon Care and Education Group
My route to Forensic Psychology was akin to Bilbo’s journey to Middle Earth, full of highs and lows, bringing fantastic people and experiences to my life. In addition, I also experienced despondency, fear, anxiety, overwhelm and doubt. I think those feelings are more common along the training route to becoming a Psychologist (any route!) than anyone tends to admit. I am very glad that I didn’t listen to the careers advisor at my secondary school, and embarked on the unexpected journey.
Born and raised in East London, I recall that meeting, which consisted of asking me which shop I saw myself working in, unless I was planning on having a baby when I left school, which they supposed was more likely. The scoff when I said I was going to University (I hadn’t completed college at that point) still makes me smile. Aspiration and ambition wasn’t particularly encouraged or contemplated for people from my neck of the woods. I knew at Secondary School that I wanted to work with, listen to and understand people who tend to be forgotten, underestimated and / or marginalised. Especially people who were labelled a ‘trouble maker’, ‘a bad egg’ or ‘means well but doesn’t stand a chance’ (common phrases in my school). I wasn’t sure of more than that. So I headed to De Montfort University and completed an undergraduate degree in Psychology and English Literature. I chose these subjects purely because I thought these were most likely to keep my attention, I have always loved reading. There was definitely not a strategic plan, I just listened to my gut of what I enjoyed and fascinated me. Whilst at University I had various part time jobs at a time to see me through. The thing I really enjoyed though, was being a volunteer mentor with the Youth Offending Team, supporting young people on final warning stage with the Police. My work volunteering with the YOT exposed me to a variety of roles within the field, and aligned so well with what I envisaged whilst at school, that I set my sights on becoming a Forensic Psychologist. I didn’t want to just understand, but know how to help, support and prevent. On reflection, perhaps I was conscious about how close my own life could have been to taking a similar route as the young people I was working with. I realise this sounds a bit twee, but its how I felt.
On finishing my degree I discovered that during my final year, my degree had lost the British Psychological Society (BPS) accreditation I needed to use it and progress (Graduate Basis for Registration, GBR). It never crossed my mind to check part way through a course, or that a course could lose its GBR, leaving those students adrift. After frustration and countless choice words bellowed towards the universe, I sought a bank loan and did a conversion course at the University of Nottingham. I was in unchartered territory studying to this level. In hindsight, I was fortunate for the raw hope and determination I held about continuing my studies. Taking whatever loans I could didn’t frighten me as much as it probably should have!
In those days, the Forensic Psychology Doctorate was virtually unknown / in its infancy (I’m showing my age here!) and would have been completely inaccessible to me to self-fund. I knew the BPS’s Doctoral level Qualification in Forensic Psychology (QPF) was what I needed to achieve, with HMPS (Her Majesty's Prison Service) being the biggest employer of Forensic Psychologists my best option. Assistant Psychologist jobs / trainee jobs in HMPS were rather scarce, and I recognised I had little experience in the field. So I began writing to Heads of Psychology within HMPS asking for opportunities to volunteer, in addition to volunteering with the YOT. Perhaps it was a mixture of East End charm, youthful ambition and ‘you don’t ask you don’t get’ mentality, but I was lucky enough to get a face-to-face meeting with a Head of Psychology. Whilst there were no opportunities for volunteer work, there was an Assistant Psychologist post coming up in the East Midlands. After successfully completing the Assessment Centre (which was an interesting and gruelling day, including role playing with a staff member acting as a prisoner), I gained an Assistant Psychologist post at HMP Ashwell.
I was fortunate to gain a promotion after 6 months into a Trainee Forensic Psychologist post. The opportunity was rare, and as part of the role my MSc in Forensic Psychology (stage 1 of the Qualification in Forensic Psychology) was paid for by the Prison Service. I completed my MSc part time, working full time in the prison. I remain grateful for this, as Stage 1 of the QFP now does not exist, and the prerequisite for Stage 2 is an MSc, which would have been impossible for me to self-fund. I would have been priced out of this career if it wasn’t for the Prison Service supporting and nurturing me by providing this opportunity. It is something I remain passionate about and feel that we have a long way to go in ensuring diversity and accessibility into this field of work.
Embarking on Stage 2 of the QFP was one of the most challenging and yet most rewarding experiences of my life. It was not an easy journey. There were difficulties and confusions with the route that have since been addressed and ironed out. I found the route demanding and requiring of self-motivation and belief that I didn’t always have easily accessible to me! That being said, the training route allowed me to navigate various personal life experiences that would have made a Doctorate virtually impossible (aside from the financial), including having a baby. The structure of the QFP meant that I gained a huge amount of experience over a number of years, so once I qualified I felt very ready to be an ethical and independent Practitioner Psychologist.
I had vast opportunity in the Prison Service to develop myself as an ethical and well-rounded Practitioner, training in a variety of intervention programmes, risk assessments, individual intervention skills, research and experiencing supervision with a host of inspiring and knowledgeable professionals. I worked at HMP Whatton in a variety of roles as a trainee, and Treatment Manager for the Intimate Partner Violence Programme, whilst gaining extensive experience in assessment and interventions with those who have committed sexual offences. Despite my experience and seemingly natural aptitude for the job, I found some elements particularly perplexing and time consuming, the reasons for which did not become clear for a number of years into the route.
During my time at HMP Whatton, at age 32, a supervisor, who I shall be forever grateful for, acknowledged differences in how I worked and practiced. She gently and respectfully suggested that my experiences and reflections in supervision led her to believe a dyslexia assessment might be beneficial. I was honestly shocked when I was confirmed to have dyslexia, after navigating School, College, University twice and whilst undertaking a Doctoral level professional qualification and it never once being considered by myself or anyone else. This made an incredible difference to my confidence and belief that I could reach that final goal. Now I understood why things took me longer to process when reading huge files, why I experienced sensory overload, why when I formulated with an individual to understand their experiences and behaviours that it looked so different from how others did it, and my difficulties with organisation and planning were not me being ‘that girl who shouldn’t be here’. It allowed me to develop strategy and skills which I have utilised over the years for my benefit, and into being the best supervisor I can be for others coming up and developing in the profession. I completed several core role exemplars during my time at Ashwell and Whatton. However, for various reasons I was unable to submit some exemplars when I would have liked due to the nature of the work I was involved in (politics are ever involved in the world of Forensic Psychology due to the nature of the work). I admit this led me to become disheartened and lose my mojo for a time. I was close to giving up. It felt that the journey was perhaps just not meant for me. But each time I felt this way, I did manage to dig deep, find something that took me back to the path that seemed right for me.
After a number of years at HMP Whatton I reflected that I needed to change environment and pursue working with younger individuals, so gained a trainee post at HMYOI Glen Parva. I thoroughly enjoyed my time at HMYOI Glen Parva and it was here where my passions and interests as a Practitioner, had space to develop and grow. I felt passionately about these young men being considered holistically. To view their risks and behaviours in the context of their experiences and environments; building connections and rapport with individuals to support them in believing there was somewhere for them in this world beyond what it could feel like sat alone within 4 small walls behind a large fence. I also felt similarly regarding the development of co-workers and trainees, making my final training competency exemplar to focus on encouraging trainees to reflect on their identity and who they were as practitioners. I was conscious that the feeling of not quite fitting in had followed me throughout my time in the Prison Service and found the opportunity for this sort of reflection wasn’t always available; it tended to be supervisor dependent, so I was keen to encourage this sort of thinking for many other trainees.
Once I qualified and became a Chartered and Registered Forensic Psychologist, there were no qualified posts for me nearby to slot into within HMPS; childcare needing to take the priority as a single parent. So I explored my options and moved into the NHS mental health secure unit Arnold Lodge. Arnold Lodge gifted me with further opportunities to really reflect on and develop my identity as a Forensic / Practitioner Psychologist. I gained a wealth of experience and confidence during this time, and loved developing support plans for patients, reflecting on their risks and working alongside them to develop progression plans. I furthered my interest in supporting individuals who set fires and enjoyed delivering therapeutic interventions in this area. Being immersed in the medical model so directly however, demonstrated to me just how strongly I felt about the importance of considering individual experience and trauma, and moving away from the labels hoisted onto individuals. I struggled to balance my identity and beliefs with the limitations of trying to embody change within the system. Once again, the universe offered opportunity that was unexpected, but led me to what I believe is where I should be, in the form of an out of the blue job offer.
I have worked in my current role for 4.5 years, with children looked after outside of their original home, children who have additional needs who require alternative education provisions and the incredible staff teams who provide the nurturing care and support for them at Horizon Care and Education Group. At the core of my work is ensuring that consideration of trauma and past experiences informs everything that we do as a company. When I talk to the children, I hear so many of the voices and experiences of the adults I have worked with in custody, both in the NHS and HMPS. It is my goal to ensure these voices are heard, in time, and to work hard to prevent / reduce a negative trajectory for these incredible, inspiring and vulnerable members of society. I believe my Forensic Psychology training gives me a unique perspective on supporting and understanding our young people’s risks, vulnerabilities and protective factors (those things that support and protect them). I have been fortunate to write a couple of book chapters about Forensic Psychology in this field, and I thoroughly enjoy guest lecturing on the Forensic Psychology MSc at Lincoln University on the complex needs of looked after children. My training and career journey has been an eventful one and I will continue utilising my experience to support others embarking on the journey in my roles as a Co-ordinating supervisor for trainees on the QFP, and as an assessor for the route.
I was asked to end this blog with my aspirations for the future. I would say this is to continue to listen to my gut, keeping those aspirations as real now at 41 as they were at 15, and in the words of Bilbo Baggins - “Go back? No good at all! Go sideways? Impossible! Go forward? Only thing to do! On we go!”.
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